Weigh In Wednesday....two years later

Hello, after a nice little two year break, I thought I'd clear the cob webs and blow the dust off the old blog. I wish I could tell you my weight on this most auspicious and bloggable Wednesday, but I don't even have a scale in this house :) Where am I from two years ago? I'm still a chunky monkey and health wise, my issues are being addressed, pharmaceutically speaking. I'm here to tell you that, despite my brain's best efforts, I'm feeling very unlike me lately. I'm feeling like... like I have hope. Hope that I'll start living up to my potential, hope that someone reads this and it does something for them, hope that I'll finish writing this in time to pick up an avocado BLT on my way to work, hope that I remember hope isn't a strategy and I should probably come up with a plan to meet my goals.

So, why am I back, you may ask? Well, I'm about to start an epic journey and thought I could use some company. I'm 37 years old and I'm on medication for Type II diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and I'm sick of it. It occurred to me the other day that if I do what I've always done, I'll get what I've always gotten. Quite frankly, I'm looking for something different now. Topically, I can say that I would like to be thin and have a nice complexion, but realistically, I want those things to be the side effect of what I really want, what I really need. I want to pursue and reach my optimal health. I want to not have to feel shameful after a meal when I pull out a dozen prescription drugs to ingest. I want to no longer spend SO MUCH TIME laying around feeling exhausted when I've done nothing!

Woo, almost tipped over my soapbox during that little tirade! Basically folks, I'm doing what my job has trained me to do, which is, to start fixing what I can. I've chosen to start by addressing what I fuel my body with. I've decided to take a 90 day challenge using the meal replacement shake program, Body by Vi. It was suggested by one friend, and already, I've convinced another to join me. 90 days? I can do that standing on my head! I can't promise that at the end of 90 days I'll be convinced shakes are the way to go, but it's a start. I am patiently awaiting the arrival of my kit and thought I'd roll in here and get you kids pumped up to follow me :) Please don't worry, I'm not here to sell you anything. I just want to change me and well, I want to talk about it. In the meantime, until my tasty shakes arrive and I come back to tell you all about my map to success, please remember to be good to yourselves and be good to each other! Fatty out.

Weigh In Wednesday Week 2

Coming in at 217.6...Fatty!! Woohoo, down 2.6 lbs. from last week. However, more importantly, my waist is one inch smaller than it was a week and a half ago. Oh, who is that rocking the perma-grin? This girl!

I'm giving consideration to changing Weigh In Wednesday to Measure Up Monday. While I only "officially" weigh myself on Wed, I find myself hopping on the scale out of curiosity throughout the week. It's a little ridiculous. Even though I know when you last ate, water weight, and what you are even wearing can affect the number on the scale, I geek out a little. I'll do a mental, "OH MY HEAD, you weigh .2 pounds more than you did three hours ago, what did you do?" Then reason prevails, and I calm the hell down :-) Anyway, I'm doing weight training in addition to cardio and as I'm sure most, if not all of you know, muscle outweighs fat. So, while I might physically be shrinking, the numbers on the scale might not be going down as quickly as I hope. I shouldn't set myself up for feelings of failure, or validation for that matter, solely based on the readout of the digital demon that lives in my guest bathroom.

In other news, bread is no longer haunting my dreams. The use of low carb tortillas for wraps and thin pizza crusts seems to be satiating that need. No, this week, it's donuts. Sad admission, I just had an absolute Homer Simpson moment typing that word. Seriously, I said, ahem, out loud (to who? to myself, my dog, the universe?) "mmmmmm, donuts." I've tried to quell my sweet tooth with cherries, Atkins bars, even a low sugar ice cream bar but to no avail. Donuts are demanding my attention.

So I guess now is the time to decide on what lesson is to be learned here? Am I trying to learn perfection? Stay the path, never stray? Or, am I trying to learn to fix my mistakes? Can I have the donut because I want the donut, get over it, work out a few extra minutes and just get back on the horse? Hmmm, what will I choose to learn? I guess I'll have to mull that one over. In the meantime, I will continue snacking on my latest greatest find, Emerald's Cocoa Roasted Almonds (so tasty, so low carb, so on the top ten list) and figure out what I'm having for dinner...which I strongly suspect won't be donuts! As always, be good to yourselves and be good to each other! Fatty out.

Kind of, sort of, half assing it :-)

Let me begin by reporting that I have yet to start the 6 Week Body Makeover meal plan. Hahaha, no worries though, I've been doing a great job of watching my carbohydrate intake and working out. My blood sugars are where they should be, and for this, I consider myself to be thus far successful. For those of you who aren't local, the weather and roads were absolute crap today. In the past, I would have taken the opportunity to lay around, order pizza, soda, maybe some wings and dessert and nosh all day. Not today though! I stayed on track with my eating and still drove in this crap so I could get in my workout...pardon me while I pat myself on the back :-)

Ok, I am done congratulating myself. I've been thinking a lot about how I view these changes I've been making. In the past I've failed at reaching a goal weight/size because I thought of myself as dieting. I viewed the changes as a temporary thing to get me to a certain goal and fooled myself into thinking I could return to my ridiculously bad eating habits without ill effects. I realize now that this thing I'm doing is really me committing to a lifestyle change. I'm tired of feeling tired and uncomfortable in my own skin. I believe that with a little discipline I can eventually be taken off of most of the prescription medicine I currently take, and that is definitely important to me.

To prepare for a lifetime of healthier eating I've been reading up on smart food choices for diabetics. I was happy to find a blog on health tips and specifically found one about the top ten foods to help lower blood sugar. If you'd like to take a look, you can read the article at

http://expertdoctor.blogspot.com/2008/07/10-foods-to-lower-blood-sugar.html

Big bonus? I pretty much like everything listed. I think this is another reason I haven't really been beating myself up about not yet following the meal plan I selected. I'm sort of enjoying incorporating these different healthy options into my daily meals and see that indeed, my blood sugars are doing well. Squeezing lemon into my water, eating red cherries, garlic, avocado, onions, or sweet potatoes on a regular basis is pretty much the exact opposite of a hardship.

Overall friends, I'm significantly happier than I was two weeks ago. I'm not ashamed to admit now that I pretty much spent most of last year in a depressed funk. I was being a spectator not a participant in this life of mine, and I was miserable. I knew it would happen, but I'm still amazed at how much better I feel physically and mentally after a short period of exercise and wise food choices. My favorite part? How easy it is to smile these days. My friend commented on that yesterday, she actually told me "I was getting worried about you, welcome back!" Hahaha, just another reason to smile :-D it's good to be back. Hmmm, I still have yet to master this whole getting enough sleep thing, so off to bed for me! In the meantime, be good to yourselves and be good to each other! Fatty out!

Weigh In Wednesday

Happy Weigh In Wednesday! Fresh off the scale and coming in at 220.2, Fatty!! (the crowd goes wild) Ok, so losing 1.6 pounds might not be phenomenal for the period of three days, but hey, it's in the right direction, so, WIN!

Yesterday I started the herbal cleansing I mentioned in a previous entry. I opted to not go for the "crap your way into a new wardrobe in two days" type cleansing (ha, as pleasant as that would have made my weekend...) and am using a product called Whole Body Cleanse by Enzymatic Therapy. I like the product, I think it's a good combination (in this homeopathic remedy junkie's opinion) and it ISN'T making me painfully aware of stomach muscles I didn't know I had. Anyway, good stuff, in my UNprofessional opinion would recommend a cleanse to anyone, you got questions? I'll find you answers :-)

For obvious reasons, I am SO fixated on food now. I'm reading nutrition labels like mad, figuring what I can delete from my next meal to compensate for eating something else at the current meal, being HIGHLY aware of food commercials, and really trying to avoid walking through the baking aisle at the grocery store. I find that I no longer day dream of tropical vacations and Prince Charming. As a matter of fact, yesterday my brain was pretty fixated on one thing...bread. For those of you who still are or used to live in CA....GOD, remember Albertson's fresh french bread? Mmmm, best dollar spent EVER. Mmmm, the smell of the store around three o'clock, the hot bread nestled in it's paper sleeve, the flaky crust, the warm, tasty white bread that needed no butter or dipping oils. Ugh, it's like basic food porn. Seriously, the thought of this bread is currently trumping chocolate. On the bright side, I don't live even remotely close to an Alberston's.

It is supposed to be a balmy 38 degrees today, so I think I'll take my daily workout outside. I better google local parks, as much as I'd like to walk downtown, I'm feeling a little too weak today to resist the temptation of ducking into the various coffee shops, delis and bakeries. Before I cut out for the day, I know I'm not alone out there in food temptation , and I'm just curious, what is YOUR food porn?? Let me know! I hope you all health, wealth, and happiness. As always be good to yourselves and be good to each other! Fatty out.

Getting organized

The biggest (pardon the pun) downside of being overweight is the multitude of health issues one can end up with. I currently take medication for diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis. In addition to all of this, I'm rather fond of homeopathic remedies, so throw in a couple products from some GNC type store and basically I'm left wondering with all these freaking pills how do I even have room to consume food? Clearly I have found the room though, that's why I'm here, right? :-) Anyway, I feel like a regular Golden Girl with my new suitcase sized pill box that has helped me to organize my pharmaceutical consumption for the next two weeks. Mmmm, better living through chemistry.

Okay, on to other uncomfortable things to post in a public forum...I weighed myself Saturday and was actually pleasantly surprised. I'm 12 pounds lighter than I was at the beginning of January. How I accomplished that with my complete lack of exercise and exorbitant amount of cupcakes I've eaten these past two months is a mystery to me! But I digress....drum roll please...I weigh 221.8 pounds. (SIGH) You have no idea how many times I deleted and retyped that previous sentence. It's just a number right? Shouldn't be exceptionally difficult to type, but it was. I guess I could not post that. I guess I could just show up on this blog every week or so and say "GREAT NEWS, I'm down (insert pounds here)!", but if you don't know where I started, how will you really know how much I've accomplished when all is said and done? So, to this knot I feel in my stomach while looking at this "publish post" button, I say 221.8, 221.8, 221.8!!!

Oh yes, I decided on a meal plan! I will be following the Six-Week Body Makeover. I'm guessing folks have plenty of suggestions for plans I could follow, but the meals and frequency of meals on this plan are commensurate with a diabetic diet, so I'm happy. I start the meal plan this Wednesday and in the meantime just watch my carbohydrate intake. I've worked out the past four days in a row and already that feels easier. I have not given up smoking. I tried dieting and quitting smoking on the same day once, and let's face it, this blog is called Fatty, not Bitchy, so one vice at a time :-P

That's all for updates for now folks. As always, be good to yourselves and be good to each other! Fatty out!

Here we go!

So here it is, the beginning of Fatty vs. Food! Allow me to introduce myself, I am the "hopefully soon to be former" Fatty! Right now I'm in the planning stages of overcoming my pleasantly plumpness. I must organinze, or I'm one cupcake away from FAILURE :-P I promise this will get funny, because, well, life is funny. I hope none of you get bent out of shape that I'm calling myself fatty, but seriously, let's call a spade a spade kids. For once, I'm not calling myself fat because I hate me, I love me, and I'm going to start acting like it! I got myself here one donut and Philly cheesesteak at a time, and I'll get myself out.

Be warned, I suspect the next blog will be about me kicking this whole thing off with an herbal cleansing...I can guarantee that won't be for the faint of heart! Until then, be good to yourselves and be good to each other! Fatty out.